Best Toast

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to
spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me
wife!" That won him the top prize at the pub for the
best toast of the night!

He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the
prize for the best toast of the night." She said,
"Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?" John
said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life,
sitting in church beside me wife." "Oh, that
is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking
buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly
and said, "John won the prize the other night at the
pub with a toast about you, Mary."

She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised
meself. You know, hes only been there twice in the
last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other
time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."