A . A . A . D . D.

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D.
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder
This is how it manifests:

I decide to wash my car.

As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is
mail on the hall table.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail
in the trashcan under the table, and notice that the
trashcan is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and
take out the trash first

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox
when I take out the trash anyway, I may as well pay the
bills first.

I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is
only one check left

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk
where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the
Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put
it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the coke a vase of flowers
on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered. I set
the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses
that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going
to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container
with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be
looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on
the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den
where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills
on the floor.

So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some
towels and wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I
was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn't washed, the bills
aren't paid, there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the
counter, the flowers aren't watered, there is still only
one check in my checkbook, I can't find the remote, I
can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did
with the car keys.

Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long,
and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get
some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you
know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL
LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC!